“Sometimes you have to do that with adults–just say what they need you to say–so they’ll get out of your face.”
—Tarantula Shoes by Tom Birdseye
“I’m so far gone that I’m telling the truth. It sounds like a foreign language.”
—Father Figure by Richard Peck
“The trouble with jogging is that by the time you realize you’re not in shape for it, it’s too far to walk back.”
—Franklin Jones
“Asking politicians to give up a source of money is like asking Dracula to forsake blood.”
—Cal Thomas
“A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well-known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.”
—Fred Allen
“Don’t be so humble–you are not that great.”
—Golda Meir
“God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.”
“If you’re going to make every game a matter of life or death, you’re going to have a lot of problems. For one thing, you’ll be dead a lot.”
—Dean Smith
“Home is a place where teenagers go to refuel.”
—Unknown
“Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.”
—Tori Filler
“There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.”
—Steven Wright
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